The Little Mermaid

1. To those who say "Ariel is an idiot!" (for any number of reasons):

I say:

You're the idiots, idiots.

Her desires and actions(yes, even that one) are completely understandable.

The way I see it, all too many people spend so much time with their heads up their asses, they forget to put themselves in someone else's shoes.

I am here to put all who read this in Ariel's... shoes, or fins, rather, and strike down a few common misconceptions in the process.

Ready, or not, here's where you're wrong:

2. To those who say: "Ariel only wanted legs and/or Eric."

I say: She wanted more(than just him)!

The creators made it plain as night that Ariel always had a fascination with the human world. She didn't just want to walk, she wanted to experience everything you humans do. 

Walking, dancing, laying around on a warm beach, and learning about a great many things from us.

I may not know what lies in mysterious fathoms below, but what I do know is I sure as shit can't fathom how so many could miss this when THE song spells it out:

As for the second point, again, she was into the human world from the very beginning, he was just another(albeit pretty big) incentive. The crown jewel, perhaps one could say.

2. To those who say: Triton has a good point(from his pov), so Ariel should obey her father:

I say: Not so, and she absolutely should not!

...or at least, she shouldn't obey him to the point that she up and lets him choose her life for her.

Triton does indeed have reasons for what he believes, some understandable,

(his wife's accidental, though no less tragic death at the hands of some sailors)

some not. 

(The canonically vegetarian merfolk aside, carnivorous fish are technically "Fish-eaters", too.)

However, there's nothing stopping him from at least considering at some point that he might be mistaken. 

I mean, hey, humans are people, too!

-and when it's daughter's happiness at stake, wouldn't that be a good time to just try and reconsider? Get a better understanding of the human world? Maybe find out the two species's aren't so separate, after all?

Alas, he does not believe so, which leads to my next point.

3. To those who say: "Again, Ariel's a fucking idiot! She made a deal with the devil!"

I say: Again, you're the idiots, and you're WRONG!(about the first part, and I'm getting real sick of you talking that way about my angelfish) 

Yes, she did indeed make a Faustian pact, HOWEVER! This was not done out of stupidity, it was done out of desperation and a broken heart. 

-and yes, I'm well aware Triton was acting out of desperation as well. I know he didn't do what he did for cruelty's sake, but it was still wrong and he admits that himself. 

It's funny that despite how both do pretty much the same things, Ariel's the one who gets the brunt of the Fan Dumb.

They both make serious albeit understandable mistakes, given the circumstances, and they both regret what they've done when they see the damage they've ended up causing. 

Despite these similarities, it's all-too-often her and her alone that so many idiot fans criticize, focusing solely on the harm that was done by Ariel instead of giving some thought to the harm that was done to her.

After what she'd been through...

How can you blame her? She's hurt and vulnerable, and gets a once-in-a-lifetime offer for what  she wants more than anything else in the world! Her dream handed to her on a platter by one of the very few people, if not the only person, who could grant it.

Plus...

Listen to the lyrics starting at 3:15.

"GO AHEAD! MAKE YOUR CHOICE!"

"I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day..."

Ursula is clearly pressuring her to take the deal. 

Right then, right there.

Seriously, put yourself in Ariel's place. You've just been emotionally shattered, and now, the one person who can give you your dream, the very thing you've been captivated by for so very long is offering it you. 

Can you really say with certainty that you wouldn't take it? Even if you'd have to give up something precious to you, even if you could stand to lose something even more precious than that if you, well, lose, can you really say that if you were in her position, you wouldn't take the offer?

To those who'd argue Ursula seems less-than-trustworthy... 

You're right, but how would anyone in Ariel's place guess she'd go as far as she did? 

Besides, there are two key details:

For one, she swore up and down she's "repented all her ways". She's clearly painting a sympathetic self-portrait.

For two, the "rake 'em 'cross the coals" bit is a sign she's a fairly dangerous sort, I grant you that, but on the other hand, it coming directly from her makes her seem honest.

As far as Ariel can tell, Ursy's a classic firm-but-fair type. Therefore, the only thing she has to fear, from her perspective is the aforementioned coal-raking and that's only if she fails.

Well, it would be if Ursula had any intention of making a fair bargain.

Instead, she goes out of her way to fuck Ariel over. 

You see, she had an agenda the entire time.

She had planned to use the unbreakable magic contract to take Triton's power once Ariel failed to fulfill on her end, and then she tried to sabotage her when it looked like she might actually succeed.

As we see here, Ursula specializes in these kind of deals:

-and when someone might actually make good on their end of the deal?

Well...

There's no way anyone in their right mind could say these are fair bargains. 

Then again, maybe the problem is the naysayers don't have right minds to begin with. Snap.

There is literally no way Ariel could have seen this mess coming.

Finally...

4. To those who say: "Ariel didn't learn a damn thing!"

I say: Yes, she did, you dumb fuck.

Nostalgia Critic himself pointed this out in his review:

4:16 is where she apologizes.

She acknowledges she made a huge mistake, and I credit Mister Walker for showing that, but...

I'm more than a little pissed about the rest of the crap he(and Miss Ellis) give Ariel.

The mistake was trusting the sea witch, she wasn't wrong for wanting more out of life, that's a load of fucking shit!

If anything, Triton's the one who was wrong. 

He was wrong about humans. In the end, he comes to realize they're not the heartless bastards he thought they were. Well, most of them, but you get what I mean.

I mean, seriously! Fuck that "Ariel's a spoiled brat" bullshit, there's nothing selfish about wanting your own life. That's what so many forget, it's her life.

Is anyone who's ever moved to another place or looked for a different job selfish for thinking they'd be happier in another place or happier with a different job?

No, and neither is Ariel.

Wreck-It Ralph from the titular film(another great Disney classic) puts it best in just one line:

"Is it Turbo(nuts) to want more out of life?"

Ralph, Quasimodo, Belle... they all wanted a different life for themselves.

Now, true, he and Quasimodo,(and to a lesser extent, Belle) were in pretty lousy situations, you could definitely argue they had more reason to want to escape to something new, but the thing is...

Ariel is Ariel. Her curiosity, her love and fascination with the human world, that's just who she is, and when you don't let someone be who they are... well, you're an asshole.

You tell me... Is that the right choice? To force someone to be someone they aren't?

Sebastian himself was about as strict as strict gets, and even he knew keeping her "Under the Sea" where she was just plain miserable was wrong.

The damage that was caused notwithstanding, there was nothing inherently harmful about her desire to be part of another world, as opposed to the unquestionably harmful xenophobic beliefs Triton embraced.

As for her happy ending, that most certainly was not her being "rewarded for whining" as Walker says. Quite the opposite, in fact.

She got her happy ending because she earned it. She took the time to get to know Eric. They ate together, went for carriage rides, went on a romantic boat ride in a beautiful lagoon, and finally, saved eachother's lives. 

With all the effort she put into their relationship and what she had sacrificed for the chance to be with him in the first place, how could anyone say it wasn't the happy ending she earned?

Should she really have been deprived of what she worked so hard far merely because of the fallout of a single mistake? That no one, let alone a heartbroken young woman could've seen coming? 

Fuck that noise.

FUCK. THAT. NOISE.

Alright, that about wraps it up.

I've made the best points I could and it took quite a bit of time and thought, so to those who say I'm wrong, I say: